Although,


Who doesn't know what I'm talking about
Who's never left home, who's never struck out
To find a dream and a life of their own
A place in the clouds, a foundation of stone

Many precede and many will follow
A young girl's dream no longer hollow
It takes the shape of a place out west
But what it holds for her, she hasn't yet guessed

[Chorus:]
She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

She traveled this road as a child
Wide eyed and grinning, she never tired
But now she won't be coming back with the rest
If these are life's lessons, she'll take this test

[Repeat Chorus]
She knows the high stakes

As her folks drive away, her dad yells, "Check the oil!"
Mom stares out the window and says, "I'm leaving my girl"
She said, "It didn't seem like that long ago"
When she stood there and let her own folks know

[Repeat Chorus]
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes
She knows the highest stakes

A tad redundant, but accurate nonetheless.

You'd said we'd never get this far
You said your words,
we've played our parts
Said your two cents now
It's my turn

So, sit down,
shut up
Are you ready?

So, you think you know how this story goes
Are you ready for this?

Sit down, are you ready for this?
Shut up, are you ready for this?
Stand up, are you ready for this?
This game
Are you ready?

I thought you'd never come this far
I thought your words meant something more
Said my two cents now
It's your turn
So stand up and scream
Are you ready?

So you think you know how this story goes
Are you ready for this?

Sit down, are you ready for this?
Shut up, are you ready for this?
Stand up, are you ready for this?
This game
Are you ready?

Are you ready?

Are you ready for this?
Sit down, are you ready for this?
Shut up, are you ready for this?
Stand up, are you ready for this?
This game
Are you ready for this?


Is there something wrong with me?

Trouble

I sometimes wonder if people see me as more trouble than I'm worth, and move on. I don't pretend to not be trouble, there's plenty of things wrong with me on more than one level. The biggest issue that arises in relationships though is my insecurity. Now forgetting for a second all of the stereotypical songs and quotes and whatnot that follow a broken heart (First Cut is the Deepest, Sometimes I wake up crying, Starts With Goodbye, Brokenheartsville, Just to See you Smile, and of course the best poems in the world: When We Two Parted and I Watched Thee, by Lord Byron, just to name a few) there is something to be said about having your heart broken. It does hurt, and it does leave a mark, figuratively and literally in my case, and it does change a person. I heard it described once thusly: You can only kick a puppy so many times before its spirit breaks and it learns to fear. However melodramatic it sounds, its absolutely true. I've been hurt a lot. I've had a great number of relationships fail on me, often dramatically of the crashing and burning variety. So what if its made me a little skittish? Its so difficult for me to not know where I stand in relationships, and thats what screws me over everytime.

I've gotta go shower now, ultimate frisbee game in an hour, more later.

Song

I just discovered this song, and I like it. I couldn't tell you why, but I do.

When you refuse me
You confuse me
What makes you think I’ll let you in again
Think again my friend
Go on misuse me and abuse me
I’ll come out stronger in the end

And does it make you sad
To find yourself alone
And does it make you mad
To find that I have grown
I’ll bet it hurts so bad
To see the strength that I have shown

When you answer the door pick up the phone
You wont find me cause I’m not coming home

You don’t know how much this hurts me
To say these things that I don’t want to say
But have to say them anyway
I would do anything to end your suffering
But you would rather walk away

And does it make you sad
To find yourself alone
And does it make you mad
To find that I have grown
I’ll bet it hurts so bad
To see the strength that I have shown

When you answer the door pick up the phone
You wont find me cause I’m not coming home.